The School of Life
The School of Life is a global organisation dedicated to fostering emotional well-being, both through our YouTube channel and our real-life schools in 10 locations around the world. We apply psychology, philosophy, and culture to everyday life, addressing the questions we're never taught enough about at regular school or college: How can relationships go well? What is meaningful work? How can love last? How can one find calm? What has gone wrong (and right) with capitalism? We love the humanities, especially philosophy, psychotherapy, literature and art - always going to them in search of ideas that are thought-provoking, useful and consoling. We're about wisdom, emotional intelligence and self-understanding. Download our free app here: https://www.theschooloflife.com/london/community/ We publish two films a week, on Tuesdays and Thursdays at 14.00hrs GMT.

543 videos
The Problem With Being Too Logical in Love The Problem With Being Too Logical in Love
2 days ago En
There's a particular kind of argument that can take place in a relationship when one person starts to be - provocatively - too 'rational' and logical. It sounds like this might be a clever and good move, but excessive logic can constitute a kind of obtuseness all of its own. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2tjL7xK Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2MZaJsL Download our App: https://bit.ly/2SseZ9X FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2DwEVqF “It seems odd at first to imagine that we might get angry, even maddened, by a partner because they were, in the course of a discussion, proving to be too reasonable and too logical. We are used to thinking highly of reason and logic. We are not normally enemies of evidence and rationality. How then could these ingredients become problematic in the course of love? But from close up, considered with sufficient imagination, our suspicion can make a lot of sense. When we are in difficulties what we may primarily be seeking from our partners is a sense that they understand what we are going through. We are not looking for answers (the problems may be too large for there to be any obvious ones) so much as comfort, reassurance and fellow-feeling. In the circumstances, the deployment of an overly logical stance may come across not as an act of kindness, but as a species of disguised impatience.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2Sq72Cl Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2SseZ9X Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Creative Seed https://creativeseed.co.za/ Title animation produced in collaboration with Vale Productions https://www.valeproductions.co.uk/
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Arguments When There Is Too Little Sex Arguments When There Is Too Little Sex
1 week ago En
There's a special kind of argument that can arise in a couple when, for a range of reasons, there hasn't been enough sex. Unfortunately, couples tend to feel too ashamed to mention what the argument is really about - and so squabble about essentially unrelated things. Even worse, the fact there are arguments makes it ever less likely that sex will actually take place in the future. The couple is stuck in a cycle that needs to be understood - and then broken. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2SqyGzd Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2I3sGaC Download our App: https://bit.ly/2SIhh45 FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2Dy0R4U “It could, on the surface, be an argument about almost anything: what time to leave for the airport, who forgot to post the tax form, where to send the children to school… But, in reality, in disguise, unmentioned and unmentionable, it is typically the very same argument, the no-sex argument…” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2SuokhG Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2SIhh45 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: David Crisp http://www.mistercrisp.com/ Title animation produced in collaboration with Vale Productions https://www.valeproductions.co.uk/
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Why We Sometimes Try to Make Our Partner Sad Why We Sometimes Try to Make Our Partner Sad
2 weeks ago En
It sounds odd but there are times when we deliberately want to make our partner sad, not because we are evil, but because their cheeriness leaves us feeling abandoned and isolated. The dynamic isn't mature, but it's certainly worthy of analysis - and a little education. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2WDpRAh Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2G8iegr Download our App: https://bit.ly/2SaxBva FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2SohZUe “There is a kind of argument that begins with one partner deliberately – and for no immediately obvious reason – attempting to spoil the good mood and high spirits of the other. The cheerful partner may be cooking a cake for their visiting nephew or whistling a tune while they rearrange the kitchen. They may be making plans for the weekend or discussing what fun it will be to see an old school friend again soon. Or they may be expressing unusual optimism about their professional future and financial prospects.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2RAko9D Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2SaxBva Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Peter Caries Title animation produced in collaboration with Vale Productions https://www.valeproductions.co.uk/
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Why It's Useful to Think of Yourself As a Sinner Why It's Useful to Think of Yourself As a Sinner
3 weeks ago En
We're generally taught nowadays to think very well of ourselves - and look with horror at religions' suggestions that we conceive of ourselves as 'sinners'. Yet, paradoxically, thinking of yourself as by nature a little sinful can lie at the origins of some very fine and noble traits of character. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2Bcm0RH Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2FUfUJD Download our App: https://bit.ly/2HL5SfU FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2sWtMdL “One of the strangest ideas bequeathed to us by religion is the notion that it might be wise and socially beneficial to think of ourselves as being, every one of us, sinners. This seems, at first glance, both patently untrue – and deeply unhelpful. The vast majority of us have committed no particularly egregious crime and might feel understandably targeted and shamed to have to carry such a dark and archaic title. Furthermore, a burden of non-specific guilt seems like a sure route to damaged morale and a hounded personality.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2G8fZbV Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2HL5SfU Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Vale Productions https://www.valeproductions.co.uk/ Title animation produced in collaboration with Vale Productions https://www.valeproductions.co.uk/
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How to Cope With an Avoidant Partner How to Cope With an Avoidant Partner
3 weeks ago En
Many of us struggle to cope with partners who are by their nature emotionally avoidant. Part of the solution comes from recognising the challenges involved, having sympathy for what makes people avoidant and learning to apply some well-tested new patterns of behaviour. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2G5wXrz Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2HDVnuG Download our App: https://bit.ly/2WqVXzm FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2CT2kSK “There are, for many of us, few people as attractive as the avoidant; the sort that are permanently a little mysterious; who don’t speak so much; around whom one never quite knows where one is; in whose eyes there is a faraway look, and perhaps a certain melancholy too; in whose hearts we intuit a sadness we long to, but never quite can, touch; people who seem to promise us intimacy and connection, and yet who remain – however long we have been with them – mesmerisingly unreassuring.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2RoxAhG Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2WqVXzm Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Lottie Kingslake https://lottiekingslake.co.uk/work Title animation produced in collaboration with: Vale Productions https://www.valeproductions.co.uk/
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Why No One Can Understand Us Unless We Speak Why No One Can Understand Us Unless We Speak
4 weeks ago En
Without quite knowing we do this, we often behave as if other people should understand what we want and feel by magic, without us putting things into words. It's a relic from childhood which we should outgrow, doing the world the favour of expressing our moods cogently, rather than hoping others can guess at them. They can't, even the very nice ones! Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2W9oYPW Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2W9oYPW Download our App: https://bit.ly/2U7S2FG FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2T5RRdF “It sounds absurd when stated baldly, but we do not always – at some deep level – understand that we need to speak to those whom we so badly wish would understand us. We long for our intentions to be known, for our moods to be honoured, for our states of mind to be read – but we do not for that matter want to speak or particularly see an urgent need to do so. We want to be guessed at, intuited, read by a kind of magic we don’t realise we believe in. We want people to know what we have not bothered to tell them. We may even, in certain moods, suspect that they know full well what we think and want – but are deliberately frustrating us in order to score points and humiliate us. The only explanations for them not having guessed already is rudeness, a lack of love or extreme stupidity.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2RWF00h Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2U7S2FG Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Martin Stacey http://www.martinstacey.co.uk/
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Why Touch Matters so Much in Love Why Touch Matters so Much in Love
1 month ago En
We should give due recognition to the truly grave hurt that can unfold, within established relationships, when there is almost no touch left between the parties, when one partner repeatedly moves to hold the other’s hand - and nothing much happens in response. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2Hpr4Yl Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2FOdWd4 Download our App: https://bit.ly/2FOdwn0 FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2MpbWJw “We live in an age increasingly prepared to see hurtful aspects lurking within many apparently so-called minor situations, and ready to lend greater public acknowledgement to what had previously been merely private pains. It is in this context that we should give due recognition to a truly grave hurt that can unfold, within established relationships, when there is almost no touch left between the parties, when one partner repeatedly moves to hold the other’s hand, or perhaps caress their shoulder or waist – and receives no response at all, or a subtle turn away and withdrawal.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2RFuuuR Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2FOdwn0 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Hend and Lamiaa http://hendandlamiaa.com/ Directed & Designed by: Hend Esmat and Lamiaa Diab Animation by: Hend Esmat Lamiaa Diab Mona Diab Noura Kamal
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Why You'll Never Find the Right Person Why You'll Never Find the Right Person
1 month ago En
It could sound rather brutal to hear that we'll never find the right person, but it's in fact the most generous and optimistic sentiment, because only once we give up on the absurd dream of finding the Right Person (who doesn't exist for anyone), can we start to make it work with that far more realistic and likely partner: the good enough person. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2SVHOI2 Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2VOxnYR Download our App: https://bit.ly/2TPXQn6 FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2TOuyVO “Your fears are right: you won’t. It seems harsh to say it just now but the right partner for you doesn’t really exist: there are just different varieties and degrees of wrongness. It’s not your fault or theirs. Anyone, however lovely they seem at first, will turn out to be maddening, difficult and deeply disappointing in a few – but to you very important – ways.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2VVwvkX Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2TPXQn6 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Tomás Pichardo-Espaillat https://vimeo.com/tomatico http://hola.tomatico.net/
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What We Should Eat on a Date What We Should Eat on a Date
1 month ago En
Choosing what to eat on a date might sound like a very trivial and inconsequential move but if a date is an audition for love, then food can play a subtle and significant role in communicating who we are and why we might be a suitable match. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2Da2HtA Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2DbtR3i Download our App: https://bit.ly/2M9M44i FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2Fu9tg2 “Restaurants have traditionally enjoyed a crucial and privileged place in the history of dating, providing us with enough privacy to get to know one another and enough public scrutiny to help us feel safe as we do so. The food has largely been an excuse. But what we decide to eat and drink together isn’t merely incidental to the real task of mutual understanding. It too is rich in psychological clues, communicating messages about who we are and what we might be like over a lifetime. How we order can in a minor key belong to the task of winning someone else over to our cause.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2Rxvykn Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2M9M44i Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Noelle Smith Design http://www.noellesmithdesign.com/
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No One Really Knows No One Really Knows
1 month ago En
What often holds us back from taking the initiative is the sense that other people out there must know better than we do. But in a great many cases, there is a more exciting, slightly scary and at heart thrilling idea to discover: that no one really knows. By this we mean that, in unexpected areas, there is no high up authority that can tell us for sure what is going to work or not, what is good or bad, why things are the way they are. Recognition of this can liberate us: we can work it out for ourselves; we can take take our own steps towards making sense of things, we can be original. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2RH1dPw Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2sgcOqM Download our App: https://bit.ly/2RgjZ13 FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2CX1S7A MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2TAeUwW Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2RgjZ13 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Alex Morris https://vimeo.com/user880140/
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How to Be a Good Guest How to Be a Good Guest
1 month ago En
Being good guest doesn't - ultimately - have to do with not being a nuisance and laughing along with your hosts. It means having a character, which may mean daring to be oneself. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2FdCLQ5 Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2FiIDXF Download our App: https://bit.ly/2VIBupk FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2seakJ8 “It’s normal to want to be a good guest; an intense wish to please tends to guide us when we accept a dinner invitation or spend a weekend with friends. And we generally fulfil this ambition by following a leading theory of what satisfies other humans: we mimic our hosts. We follow their lead in the conversation, we discuss what they want to discuss, we eat when they want to eat. We are malleable, we adjust; we laugh at pretty much anything they find funny. It sounds extremely generous and deeply well-intentioned but there’s a strange aspect to this theory: the mimetic person is not, in practice, especially pleasing. They may not be offensive, but nor are they particularly memorable, interesting or even likeable.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2VCkd0T Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2VIBupk Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Nick Hilditch http://nickhilditch.com/
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Why Strangers Can Seem so Attractive Why Strangers Can Seem so Attractive
1 month ago En
Strangers have an odd habit of seeming a lot more attractive to us than long-established and well-known partners. That's not necessarily because they really are superior, simply that we know them a lot less well. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2Rf29dV Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2Byjjt4 Download our App: https://bit.ly/2rTOWst FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2QOOPxe “The Incumbent Problem refers to the vast, but often overlooked and unfair advantage that all new people, cities and jobs have over existing – or, as we put it, incumbent – ones. The beautiful person glimpsed briefly in the street as we step off the bus, the city visited for a few days of holiday, the job we read about in a few tantalising paragraphs of a magazine; these have unwise tendencies to seem immediately and definitively superior to our current partner, our long-established home and our committed workplace and can inspire us to sudden and (in retrospect sometimes) regrettable divorces, relocations and resignations…” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2QM7JVz Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2rTOWst Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Alice Dunseath http://www.alicedunseath.com/
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Are You Difficult to Love? Are You Difficult to Love?
1 month ago En
If we are single, we tend to assume that the problem must lie with us not having found 'the right person'. But perhaps reality is a little more complicated: we might be single because we are, in certain ways we need to understand, difficult to love. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2Rgajmm Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2BBgN5f Download our App: https://bit.ly/2Q09idg FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2RjkSoQ “The idea that one is in many ways an extremely difficult person to be in a relationship with may sound rather improbable and even at points offensive. Yet fully understanding and readily and graciously admitting to this possibility might be the surest way of making sure one is an endurable proposition over the long-term. There are few people more deeply insufferable than those who don’t, at regular intervals, suspect they might be so…” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2GBiZiV Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2Q09idg Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Zedem media https://www.zedemanimations.com/en/home
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How To Love How To Love
1 month ago En
We often think that love is a natural emotion we'll experience when we come into contact with a wonderful person. In fact, it's an emotional skill we should and must practice in order to approach other humans with the required patience and generosity. Here is a guide to how to love. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2CuGMgp Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2BADQNI Download our App: https://bit.ly/2BA37HO FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2EGiwJN “One of the great intellectual puzzles that daily life forces all of us to consider on a slightly too regular basis is: ‘Why are other people so awful? How come they are so unreliable, aggressive, deceitful, mean, two-faced or cowardly?’ As we search for answers, we tend quite naturally to fall back on a standard, compact and tempting explanation: because they are terrible people. They are appalling, crooked, deformed or ‘bad’; that’s simply how some types are. The conclusion may be grim, but it also feels very true and fundamentally unbudgeable…” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://www.theschooloflife.com/london/about-us/ Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2BA37HO Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Mike Booth https://www.youtube.com/somegreybloke
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How To Meet Interesting People How To Meet Interesting People
2 months ago En
Meeting interesting people shouldn't be left to chance. We've just launched our new app on Android, IOS and web browser. See here for more details: https://bit.ly/2EsCV4S Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2GqmvN8 Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2R7wQS2 FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2SSDIQE MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2R4d1ev Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2EsCV4S Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Matthew Hammett Knott https://www.curtisbrown.co.uk/client/matthew-hammett-knott
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How Much Does Luck Decide Our Lives? How Much Does Luck Decide Our Lives?
2 months ago En
Believing that many of the big things in our lives come down to luck is, in a way, a rather insulting thought. We put so much effort into controlling our own destinies. Nevertheless, a wise life is one in which we accept how much lies outside of our control, for good and ill - and where we make a gracious accommodation with the terrifying power of Luck. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2rBuNHT Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2EmVSXI Download our App: https://bit.ly/2rrHlRQ FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2B51Nwo ”We don’t anymore nowadays much believe in Luck – or what was, in earlier ages, known as Fortune. We would think it extremely suspicious if someone explained that they had been sacked, but added that this was simply the result of ‘bad luck’. And we would think it equally strange if someone said they had made a fortune, but ascribed their triumph to mere ‘good luck’. We resist the notion that luck can play a significant role as much in our failures as in our successes. Luck is a substantial offence against modern ideals of control, strategy and foresight. We understand ourselves to be – for better and for worse – the authors of our own destinies.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://www.theschooloflife.com/london/about-us/ Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2rrHlRQ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Avi Ofer https://www.aviofer.com/
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The Challenges of Anxious-Avoidant Relationships The Challenges of Anxious-Avoidant Relationships
2 months ago En
Some of the most difficult relationships are those between people who can be categorised as 'avoidant' and others who are labelled 'anxious.' Learn to know which of these two you might be - and how better to handle the tensions that arise in a pairing with your counterpart. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2E9cxhd Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2AISjqj Download our App: https://bit.ly/2PchwyB FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2zwmdOT “There are so many ways to be unhappy in love, but one kind which modern psychology has given particular attention to are relationships, very high in number, in which one of the parties is defined as avoidant in their attachment patterns – and the other as anxious. Attachment Theory is the term given to a set of ideas about how we love and the role of childhood therein originally developed by the English psychologist John Bowlby in the 50s and 60s. It divides up humanity into three categories according to our varying capacity to behave with confidence and trust in relationships.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2zB8573 Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://www.theschooloflife.com/london/community/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Amanda Eliasson https://vimeo.com/artofam
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How To Fight In Love How To Fight In Love
2 months ago En
Arguments in relationships are always tricky but given that they are also inevitable, the skill we need to learn is how to fight well rather than not fight at all. By 'well' we mean, with charity, compassion, understanding, humour, intelligence and good will. Here is a guide to the best sorts of arguments in relationships. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2KKR1j8 Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2DVZGOj Download our App: https://bit.ly/2reyMJU FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2zB2bCO “There are couples that seem never to argue. Their relationships are marked by enormous outward politeness; they say thank you a lot; they make each other cups of tea; they can look rather horrified when there’s a mention of a squabble in someone else’s life. It’s understandable if they’re privately a little pleased with themselves. But surface harmony isn’t, in reality, any reliable sign of health in love because it’s impossible to try to merge two lives without regularly encountering deep sources of incompatibility. A lack of arguments is more likely to be a sign that we have given up caring than a superhuman achievement of maturity.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2E9gKl2 Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2reyMJU/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Lois de Silva http://www.loisdesilva.com/
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How to Be Attractive on a Date How to Be Attractive on a Date
2 months ago En
A lot of dating advice suggests that, to be attractive, we should focus on our looks, our clothes and our ability to choose a good venue. But the true secret to proving attractive is to know how to reveal our vulnerability, our maturity and our degree of self-knowledge. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2KyXBcp Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2PWaqUl Download our App: https://bit.ly/2PW7Ttj FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2KyzSZW “The goal can be stated simply enough: the overwhelming priority, when on a date with someone we like, is to persuade them to like us back. But the simplicity of the mission masks the complexity required to achieve it. Typically, the advice focuses on externals: what to wear, when to unfurl a napkin, what to order… But such counsel, however well-meaning, is at odds with what we ourselves know about attraction: that it is profoundly focused on psychology.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2SdKPml Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2PW7Ttj Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Illustrated by Natalia Ramos nataliarama.com Animated by Alexa Ledesma www.alexaledesma.com
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What to Do If You Hate Small Talk What to Do If You Hate Small Talk
2 months ago En
One of the reasons many of us find social encounters difficult is that they force into that particular conversational byway called small-talk - where we have to pay a lot of attention to the weather and the upcoming holidays. But what is small talk, why does it exist and how can we learn to navigate it more fruitfully? Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2QjIU29 Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2ScXVAb Download our App: https://bit.ly/2AuqvFY FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2r6Gtlp “A lot of discomfort about going to social engagements is rooted in what can sound like a rather high-minded concern: a hatred of small talk. We can develop a dread of parties because we know how likely we are to end up wedged into conversations about the weather, parking, traffic or the way we plan to spend the forthcoming holidays – when there would be so many deeper and more dignified topics to address: the future of humanity, the fate of the nation, or the melancholy state of our hearts. We resent parties for holding up an ideal of community and dialogue while trapping us in unproductive and insincere banter; for making us more lonely than we ever would be in our own homes.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2TNFoMr Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2AuqvFY Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Gemma Green-Hope http://www.gemmagreenhope.com/
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How Not to Be Defensive in Relationships How Not to Be Defensive in Relationships
3 months ago En
There's no more common response to a partner's remarks than to find oneself in a 'defensive' mood. It's hugely understandable, but at points unfruitful. What follows is a short guide to reversing out of defensive moods for the sake of healthier communication. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2RZTysj Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2AaQTEG Download our App no on Android, IOS + PC: https://bit.ly/2R8n6Ed FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2BhJtkP “We often operate in romantic life under the mistaken view – unconsciously imported from law courts and school debating traditions – that the person who is ‘right’ or has the stronger case should, legitimately, ‘win’ any argument. But this is fundamentally to misunderstand what the point of relationships might be. It is not to defeat an opponent (there are no prizes for ‘winning’ other than self-satisfied loneliness) so much as to try to help each other to evolve into the best versions of ourselves.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2FIGuX9 Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2R8n6Ed Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Deanca Rensyta Mihardja https://deancarensyta.brushd.com/work/23840/show-reel #TheSchoolOfLife #Relationships #Arguments
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Existentialism and Dating Existentialism and Dating
3 months ago En
At first glance, nothing immediately seems to connect the business of dating with the European philosophical movement of Existentialism. However, on closer inspection, the thoughts of Existential philosophers contain a number of insights that serve to illuminate aspects of the dating world. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2TsNR7K Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2S5XEPL Download our App: https://bit.ly/2KgB0Bf FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2QXvPZu “Dating brings us close to a particular strand of philosophy that, the rest of the time, might not seem particularly relevant to our lives: existentialism. One of the movement’s major proponents – Jean-Paul Sartre – developed a set of ideas that help explain, and give dignity to, the anxiety, excitement and at points vertigo we may experience as we go through the dating ritual. A key concept of Existentialism is expressed in Sartre’s somewhat obscure but useful phrase: “Being precedes essence”. What Sartre meant by ‘being’ are the bits of our life that we are free to choose for ourselves: how we live, what job we do, how we conceive of what happens to us. And by ‘essence’, he refers to things that lie outside our command: our biological nature, the flow of history, the position of the stars…” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2Bih65X Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2KgB0Bf Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Andrew Lees https://www.damnfinemedia.co.uk/ #TheSchoolOfLife #Existentialism #JeanPaulSartre
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How to Stop Worrying Whether or Not They Like You How to Stop Worrying Whether or Not They Like You
3 months ago En
We spend an inordinate amount of time concentrating on the question of whether or not we are liked. It would be a great deal wiser to put our energy into actually proving likeable and persuading our audience of our affection for them. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2RQW2sV Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2JYouWR Download our App: https://bit.ly/2DAODLd FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2JXaFrX “One of the most acute questions we ask ourselves in relation to new friends and acquaintances is whether or not they like us. The question feels so significant because, depending on how we answer it in our minds, we will either take steps to deepen the friendship or, as is often the case, immediately make moves to withdraw from it so as to spare ourselves humiliation and embarrassment.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2T7u1yP Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://www.theschooloflife.com/app-2/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Nick Hilditch https://nickhilditch.com/
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The Danger of Being Too Polite in Love The Danger of Being Too Polite in Love
4 months ago En
Being polite is a wonderful and hugely necessary quality; but there can - in love - be moments when politeness becomes an impediment to sincere feeling. We may at points need to give free rein to our resentments and annoyances and say it like it is - if we're later to feel properly loving and spontaneous. Good relationships are filled with respect, but they also know moments of proper frankness. There are moments when we need to put extreme politeness to one side. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2xii8MV Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2xgQ2BJ Download our App: https://bit.ly/2MDVxzx FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2paArzo “It’s natural to imagine that the highest virtue in love would be kindness and, a close second, politeness. But there is an odd danger lurking here: a relationship where we are overly polite, where there is not enough directness, where things go wrong not because of a lack of tenderness or serenity but because of a stifling excess of manners, because there aren’t enough raised voices, insults, legitimate furies and moments where both partners feel free to call each other idiots and much worse...” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2xpLNDl Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2MDVxzx Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Angie Phillips https://www.angiephillips.co/
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How Not to Be Tortured by a Love Rival How Not to Be Tortured by a Love Rival
4 months ago En
When we've been left for someone else, we'll be devastated of course, but it's easy to up the torture further by thinking that a) the rival is so much better than us b) our ex will be so much happier with them than they ever were with us. Both ideas are profoundly flawed, as our film shows. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2P0nxPO Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2OqscgO Download our App: https://bit.ly/2zLZe2V FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2y4RR4j “Sometimes, we are not only left in love; we are left for someone else – a rival who comes to assume a large, indeed monstrous position in our imaginations. The torture comes down to one essential question which pursues us into the early hours: What do they have that we do not? Part of the agony rests on a basic feature of human psychology; we know ourselves from the inside, in great and dispiriting detail, whereas we can know others only from the outside, from what they choose to reveal, which may be almost nothing, aside from an attractive face and a charming manner.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2O0IL3H Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2zLZe2V Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Lois de Silva http://www.loisdesilva.com/ #TheSchoolOfLife #BreakUps #Relationships
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Why Avoidant and Anxious Partners Find It Hard to Split Up Why Avoidant and Anxious Partners Find It Hard to Split Up
4 months ago En
Fractious couples are often made up of one party who is 'avoidant' (hiding their intimacy needs) and one who is 'anxious' (nagging and pressuring counter productively for their intimacy needs to be met). These couples go through cycles that run from cosiness to fury to sulk to blow up to cosiness. Why do these cycles happen and why are they so hard to break? What might be a better way forward? Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2IwEEpQ Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2NYDkBW Download our App: https://bit.ly/2NWdRJJ FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2zLuEXc “There is a certain sort of relationship that is alternately passionate, fiery and painfully unfulfilling – and that tends to puzzle both outsiders and its participants; a relationship between one person who is, as psychologists put it, anxiously attached and another who is avoidantly attached. There is, in such couplings, a constant game of push and pull. The anxiously attached party typically complains – more or less loudly – that their partner is not responsive enough: they accuse them of being emotionally distant, withholding, cold and perhaps physically uninterested too. The avoidant lover, for their part, stays relatively quiet but in their more fed-up moments, complains that the anxious party is far too demanding, possibly ‘mad’ and, as they put it pejoratively, ‘needy’. One person seems to want far too much, the other far too little.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2QrwC4v Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2NWdRJJ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Direction & Illustration- Natalia Ramos http://www.nataliarama.com
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HISTORY OF IDEAS - Dating HISTORY OF IDEAS - Dating
4 months ago En
The way we date nowadays has a history that it pays to try to understand as we navigate the ups and downs of the dating game. Never before in history have we had such high expectations of dating - and rarely have we been more confused. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2zsKsxP Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2DqCDwo Download our App: https://bit.ly/2Q4cV2f FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2Q4UKtd “Our present dating habits can feel like a natural part of existence, but in reality, they’ve only been around for a very short time and, we predict, won’t continue for too much longer in their current form. Dating has a history, which it pays to try to understand as we navigate the ritual’s paradoxical and often confusing priorities. Let’s take a selective look backwards – as well as a peak forwards – at the history and future of dating...” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2Ieo91t Watch more films on HISTORY in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLhistory You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2Q4cV2f Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Mike Booth https://www.youtube.com/somegreybloke
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How Can Our Phones Help Our Love Lives? How Can Our Phones Help Our Love Lives?
4 months ago En
We often look to our phones to help us resolve the tensions of our love lives: they promise us distraction, new friends and glorious escape. We can forgive ourselves our deep attachment to them - while nevertheless being a bit sceptical as to their ultimate effects on our chances of forming good relationships. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2OPdnBe Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2NFa9E4 Download our App: https://bit.ly/2xLOgZ1 FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2QX3yms “It would be most of our first choices to have relationships in the real world; but for many of us, it is a great deal more plausible to pursue them with, and via, our phones. Phones provide exemplary compensation for the frustrations of living with actual people. Unlike them, they are always responsive to the touch and their malleability provides the perfect excuse for disengagement from the trickier aspects of true connections.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2IdKkop Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2xLOgZ1 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Natalia Biegaj https://www.nb-animation.com/
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What Is Your Attachment Style? What Is Your Attachment Style?
5 months ago En
Attachment theory refers to a set of ideas formulated by psychologists in the 1960s that gives us an exceptionally useful guide to how we behave in relationships. Knowing whether we are secure, anxious or avoidant in our attachment patterns gives us a vocabulary with which to get on top of some very tricky dynamics and helps us grow into more predictable and more joyful companions in love. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2BF0N5N Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2MCcRZx Download our App: https://bit.ly/2N2UMAY FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2N2NKvQ “One of the greatest questionnaires in the history of 20th-century psychology had a modest start in the pages of a local Colorado newspaper The Rocky Mountain News in July 1985. The work of two University of Denver psychologists Cindy Hazan and Phillip Shaver, the questionnaire asked readers to identify which of three statements most closely reflected who they were in love.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2MrIVA3 Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2N2UMAY Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Julia Machowska
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The Secret to Leaving Comments Online The Secret to Leaving Comments Online
5 months ago En
Reading the Comments sections beneath films and articles can leave one feeling certain that humanity must have gone mad - or is inherently vicious and unkind. The truth is a good deal less tragic: it's just that we've never been taught how to comment or how to spot the connection between our own unhappiness and alienation - and our desire to take vengeance in the anonymous digital world. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2OwyLew Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2pbOPHy Download our App: https://bit.ly/2pkcbel FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2xiZswD “Comment sections online should be the beautiful public squares of our democracies: places we navigate to for frank and thoughtful exchanges of ideas; places where we learn to understand each other’s point of view and where serious discussions evolve over time. But, of course, they are havens of the grossest abuse, verbal violence and cruelty. It’s understandable if we sometimes conclude, after time reading comments, that humanity has lost its way…” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2xnlAoR Watch more films on Work and Capitalism in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLcapitalism You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2pkcbel Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Damn Fine Media https://www.damnfinemedia.co.uk/
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The Golden Child Syndrome The Golden Child Syndrome
5 months ago En
It's tough of course not to have been loved much by one's parents; but there's a real challenge too in having been loved too much, or rather, admired in a stifling unreal way that lies at the core of what we call 'the golden child syndrome.' Golden children aren't - despite appearances - privileged at all; they suffer from the enormous burden of expectation placed on their too-young shoulders by over-eager parents. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2Mf7vPL Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2Me5XoZ Download our App: https://bit.ly/2oSlly9 FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2NAt6Hj “We are used to thinking of many of the psychological problems of adulthood as stemming from a lack of adequate love in our early years. We grow mentally unwell – prey to underconfidence, anxiety, paranoia and shame – because, somewhere in the past, we were denied the necessary warmth, care and sympathy. But there is another, more curious, and more subtle problem that may arise from childhood years: what we can term the Golden Child syndrome.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2oU5MX0 Watch more films on SELFin our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2oSlly9 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Gemma Green-Hope http://www.gemmagreenhope.com/ #TheSchoolofLife #GoldenChildSyndrome
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How To Break Up How To Break Up
5 months ago En
Breaking up will always be something of a mess, but that's not to overlook the far better or distinctively worse ways we might do it. One of the nicest moves is to stop trying to be 'nice' and to concentrate instead on the key ingredients of the good break up: directness, explanation, clarity and a lack of ambiguity. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2wVN0CI Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2MYamSy Download our App: https://bit.ly/2MgaF5Q FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2CAlCiZ “The intensity and suffering exacted by a heartbreak depends not only on the core fact that we’ve been left; it also decisively depends on how we’ve been left. Our hurt can be hugely intensified when we’ve been left badly – just as it may be rendered a great deal more bearable when we are fortunate enough to have landed on a lover who has learnt the psychologically-rich art of mature break-ups.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2wZRSG6 Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2MgaF5Q Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Seed Sustainable Design studio https://creativeseed.co.za/ #TheSchoolofLife #HowToBreakUp #Relationships
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Why We Sometimes Don't Feel 'In The Moment' Why We Sometimes Don't Feel 'In The Moment'
5 months ago En
One of the dangers of emotional life is that we find that we don't feel 'in the moment': we're at a funeral, but we don't feel sad. We're making love, but our minds are elsewhere. It's our birthday, but we're not jolly. Why is it sometimes so hard for our true inner feelings to keep pace with events in the outer world? An investigation into the psychology of feeling in the moment - or to the left or right of it. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2Na7OzR Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2LSMQ40 Download our App: https://bit.ly/2PXeoIE FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2wCr52I “Life is full of moments where we are meant to feel certain things. The demand starts in early childhood: it’s our birthday – and we are meant to feel happy. Dad is going away for two weeks – and we should feel sad. Our school has won at team sports – and we should want to join in with a celebratory song. Adulthood continues the injunctions: we should feel devastated at funerals, touched and hopeful at weddings, enthused and moved by our families, carefree on holiday – and, in bed with someone we like, exclusively focused on the act and its pleasures.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2LO5XMf Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2PXeoIE Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Deanca Rensyta Mihardj
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What True Love Really Is What True Love Really Is
5 months ago En
Most of us think we know what love is; we may just be looking for the right person to lavish our love on. But it's no insult, and indeed it might even be helpful to imagine, that we don't have much of a clue what love really is, not because we are deficient, but because our culture never investigates the subject as it should. Here is a list of seven ingredients that the School of Life suggests lie at the heart of a proper understanding of love. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2wxX3Ob Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2MJ2PqA Download our App: https://bit.ly/2oxadXy FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2wCtwCn “The world is sick for a surprisingly modest-sounding reason: we don’t understand love – and yet we are rather convinced that we do. We talk a lot of love of course, but generally in terms of a dizzying rapture lasting a few months focused on someone’s beauty, intelligence and strength. The most convincing discussion of love in the West came from Jesus of Nazareth, which has been unfortunate, given how easy it is to overlook everything he had to say once you don’t ‘believe’.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2MLFgNW Watch more films on WORK and CAPITALISM in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLcapitalism You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2oxadXy Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Ada Wikdal https://cargocollective.com/adawikdahl
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Hypervigilance and How to Overcome It Hypervigilance and How to Overcome It
5 months ago En
Hypervigilance is a term psychologists use to refer to those among us who are locked into a state of almost continuous wariness, rumination and compulsive anxiety. By understanding more about the condition, we can take steps to mitigate its worst effects, gradually moving ourselves from hyper to more ordinary varieties of vigilance. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2Nj1NgZ Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2BQFMoE Download our App: https://bit.ly/2wfKDKD FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2wopA89 “We would not have been able to survive so long if we were not able, at points, to get very worried indeed; if we didn’t possess a native genius for flooding our minds, at astonishing speed, with a cocktail of the most intense and panicky hormones our bodies can secrete...” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2NhiOYX Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2wfKDKD Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Tomás Pichardo-Espaillat http://tomatico.net/
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How To Lengthen Your Life How To Lengthen Your Life
6 months ago En
The trick to lengthening your life isn't to eat more kale or jog more: it's to lengthen how long time feels, which can be done chiefly by introducing new experiences and routines, and opening your eyes fully to the multiple wonders of existence. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2LoKOIm Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2o2F8up Download our App: https://bit.ly/2o2P1Iw FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2o1NUZN “The normal way we set about trying to extend our lives is by striving to add more years to them – usually by eating more couscous and broccoli, going to bed early and running in the rain. But this approach may turn out to be quixotic, not only because Death can’t reliably be warded off with kale, but at a deeper level, because the best way to lengthen a life is not by attempting to stick more years on to its tail.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2BDmJOj Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2o2P1Iw Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Damn Fine Media https://www.damnfinemedia.co.uk/
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Why Are We so Easily 'triggered'? Why Are We so Easily 'triggered'?
6 months ago En
Most of us are aware that, around certain topics, we're uncomfortably easily 'triggered', that is, we react with far too much emotion to situations that don't call for it. Learning not to be so swiftly triggered means looking back into our past to understand the origins of our behaviour - and being confident that what now feels 'automatic' is in fact very changeable once we grasp where it comes from. Sign up to our new newsletter and get 10% off your first online order of a book, product or class: https://bit.ly/2LayJ9F For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2N3G50r Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2MFx3Kb Download our App: https://bit.ly/2wegeM4 FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2N0NcXn “If we were totally sane, we would respond to the present only on its own terms; we would worry or be angered or give way to anxiety only as much as the circumstances before us actually dictated. But we are not – of course – most of us quite sane, as evidenced by the way that we respond with such disproportion to certain events in the here and now. We have occasional tendencies to get wildly more worried, angry and anxious than we should, if we were simply following the facts in front of us.” MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2BtgWuH Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2wegeM4 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Nick Hilditch http://nickhilditch.com/ #TheSchoolOfLife #Psychology #triggerwarning
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What We Might Learn in Couples Therapy What We Might Learn in Couples Therapy
6 months ago En
Couples Therapy can be a very helpful place to go when it feels very hard to get through to our partners, when we are arguing too much, or are feeling isolated and lonely within a couple. The School of Life offers its own couples therapy service, available here: https://bit.ly/2KO5WYg Join our mailing list: http://bit.ly/2e0TQNJ Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2Mgm3TY Download our App: https://bit.ly/2nyNtFV FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2OxLn4y “Like many things that help our relationships, couples therapy has a habit of sounding appallingly unromantic, involving patience, gruelling work and a host of embarrassing conversations about matters it would be much nicer never to have to think about – let alone discuss with a partner and a trained stranger. Our culture teaches us to trust and follow our feelings. But couples therapy knows this is to be a disaster, for our feelings are for the most part errant and encoded with primitive responses from a troubled past. So instead, it encourages a far wiser response: standing well back from our first impulses, neutralising them through understanding and where possible rerouting them in less self-punishing and more trusting directions.” https://bit.ly/2OxLn4y MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2w6033l Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2nyNtFV Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Marcie laCerte http://marslizard.net/
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The Appeal of Lonely Places The Appeal of Lonely Places
6 months ago En
Some of us feel most at home not in obviously beautiful or homely places, but in desolate, melancholy ones, places that are vast, barren, bleak or isolated. These places speak to our souls and deserve to be celebrated as our true homes. For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2w71z58 Join our mailing list: http://bit.ly/2e0TQNJ Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2MHlHCd Download our App: https://bit.ly/2KKEFpx FURTHER READING ”When we imagine where in the world we’d be happiest, we’re often prompted to imagine places filled with people; a cosy home with family, a party with friends, a busy office or bar, well-lit streets teaming with cheerful faces… But defining happy places in these terms misses out what can be the deep appeal of far less publicised and distinguished sorts of environment: locations that are starkly downbeat, empty, melancholic, architecturally compromised and isolated – but where we nevertheless experience a deep pull, coming to feel, perhaps, that we belong here far more than in the gaiety, elegance and colour of familiar vistas.” You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2wc01XZ MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2KJyB0J Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2KKEFpx Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Jeremy Riggall, Sketch films http://sketchfilms.co.uk/
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The Problem of Shame The Problem of Shame
6 months ago En
Underlying so many of our emotional problems lies one phenomenon above any other; shame. Feeling misguidedly and disproportionately ashamed of who we are is at the root of an extraordinary amount of disturbance, rendering us harmful to ourselves and to the world. For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2LXOXrl Join our mailing list: http://bit.ly/2e0TQNJ Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2vCPCE9 Download our App: https://bit.ly/2vE7MFv FURTHER READING “One of the great problems in the world is also one of the most invisible, because – by its nature – it asks to be hidden and saps our ability to spot its symptoms. But, to generalise grossly, few things so undermine human well-being as the sickness of shame.” You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2vqDbfF MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2KvHVVP Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2vE7MFv Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Nina Cosford http://www.ninacosford.com
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The Impact of Early Emotional Neglect The Impact of Early Emotional Neglect
6 months ago En
A lot of our adult problems come down to varieties of emotional neglect suffered in childhood. In this film, we look at one of the most famous experiments in the history of psychology, The Still Face Experiment, devised by Professor Ed Tronick - which gives us an insight into the vulnerability of, and need for love in young children. For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2v1rTho Join our mailing list: http://bit.ly/2e0TQNJ Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2NVwt89 Download our App: https://bit.ly/2Aib6f4 FURTHER READING “Many of us are wandering the world bearing a lot of emotional damage. We may be depressed, anxious or very difficult around sex and relationships. We might in certain moods ask ourselves where the difficulties came from. It’s a continually weird, provocative and yet – in The School of Life’s view – extremely accurate answer that the damage comes, almost always, from childhood, especially early childhood.” You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2LvbX1a MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2Lx7gnM Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2Aib6f4 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Matt Knott https://www.curtisbrown.co.uk/client/matthew-hammett-knott #TheSchoolOfLife #Psychology #Love
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Feeling Grateful for the Small Things Feeling Grateful for the Small Things
7 months ago En
We sometimes imagine, especially when we're young, that happiness is made up of huge things, like lots of money, fame, amazing love stories. But with time, we may come to realise that small pleasures are at the root of keeping on going with life; we're ready to feel grateful for the little things. For gifts and more from The School of Life, visit our online shop: https://bit.ly/2A4KrlY Join our mailing list: http://bit.ly/2e0TQNJ Our website has classes, articles and products to help you think and grow: https://bit.ly/2uZ7BV9 Download our App: https://bit.ly/2A4KrlY FURTHER READING “The standard habit of the mind is to take careful note what’s not right in our lives and obsess about all that is missing. But in a new mood, perhaps after a lot of longing and turmoil, we pause and notice some of what has – remarkably – not gone wrong. The house is looking beautiful at the moment. We’re in pretty good health, all things considered. The afternoon sun is deeply reassuring. Sometimes the children are kind. Our partner is – at points – very generous. It’s been quite mild lately. Yesterday, we were happy all evening. We’re quite enjoying our work at the moment.” You can read more on this and other subjects on our blog, here: https://bit.ly/2LvW21S MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Visit us in person at our London HQ: https://bit.ly/2NG1LQm Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself You can submit translations and transcripts on all of our videos here: https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_cs_panel?c=UC7IcJI8PUf5Z3zKxnZvTBog&tab=2 Find out how more here: https://support.google.com/youtube/answer/6054623?hl=en-GB SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Download our App: https://bit.ly/2A4KrlY Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: James Carbutt https://vimeo.com/jamescarbutt #TheLittleThings #TheSchoolOfLife
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